green leaf.

Thursday, August 31, 2006

Just Call Me Inspektor ....

Oh how evolution has reared its ugly head into the twisted sands of the celebrity baby-naming game. The offsprings will probably have to bear the brunt of having such unfortunate monikers ... something along the lines of being beaten to death in the school yard, by Puma maybe? No, not a puma, but a girl named Puma! Can just picture her chomping on little Diva Muffin. Better yet, try to picture this scene in a bar some years down the road...

Unfortunate chick: "Hi, what's your name?"
Dude: "Name's Romeo."
Unfortunate chick: "I'm Camera. Would you like me to flash you?"

I mean there are already various books on the shelves containing Unusual Baby Names, where some are quite nice, actually. But these big cahunas just had to scar their children for life with names like Bamboo, Saffron and Speck Wildhorse! We are well aware of the current fruit phase of baby-naming - Apple, Peach and Honeyblossom. Again with the fruit and nature! You guys beavers or something? In 1983, one celebrity named her twins Ross and Rachel. Hehe... then again how could she have known, eh? How did this one particular celeb ended up naming his child Tu Morow is beyond me.

Unfortunate chick 2: "Hi."
Dude 2: "Hi, what's your name?"
Unfortunate chick 2: "Tu Morow."
Dude 2: "You could always tell me now..."

Yikes. Let me tell you, Moxie Crimefighter and Pirate have already made their way onto birth certificates. So have Lexus, Canon and Porsche. The parents of the third kid probably didn't want to go with the conventional P-o-r-t-i-a spelling. Potato, patata! Good luck filling out a form Heavenly Hiirani Tiger Lily! Ya ha... I'm not kidding.

However, traditional and retro names have also made a comeback and some many celebs were sane enough to have a pick at them. NYPD Blue's Mark-Paul named his kid Michael Charles, comedian Jon Stewart picked Nathan and some chose James, Charlies and Mabel.

So, yeah. With all being said, I think my favourite celebrity children names are Willow (Will Smith and Jada-Pinkett's) and Iris (Jude Law's). Exotic but simple.

Who knows there might be a Espn and iPod in the near future. Aiyayai!

green leaf ;

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